What is Love?
I haven't blogged here at the Handmaids blogsite for a while now, as I've been knee-deep in alligators alongside our daughter Reagan as she battles bone cancer. I have been blogging on her Carepage for the last few months and will be transferring some of those blog posts here over the course of the next few weeks. Please continue to keep us all in your prayers as we continue on our faith journey.
Yesterday was an emotional day for me. After I put the kids on the bus I had a little quiet time to do my daily scripture reading and meditation. The first reading was from 1 Cor 12:31-13:13. It has held great significance for me since the first time I can recall truly reading it with a mature understanding, while in high school. Then I went off to Longwood and became a member of Sigma Alpha Iota, the music fraternity for women. A BIG SHOUT OUT to Michelle, Cindy, Ziggy (Elizabeth), Trese, and Becca, my FOREVER SAI Sisters. This scripture was and hopefully continues to be special to SAI. When John and I were choosing the scripture for our wedding, we chose it as well. So, I sat alone yesterday morning, reflecting on all those memories as tears streamed down my face.
1 Cor 12:31-13:13
Brothers and sisters:
Strive eagerly for the greatest spiritual gifts.
But I shall show you a still more excellent way.
If I speak in human and angelic tongues
but do not have love,
I am a resounding gong or a clashing cymbal.
And if I have the gift of prophecy
and comprehend all mysteries and all knowledge;
if I have all faith so as to move mountains,
but do not have love, I am nothing.
If I give away everything I own,
and if I hand my body over so that I may boast
but do not have love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind.
It is not jealous, love is not pompous,
it is not inflated, it is not rude,
it does not seek its own interests,
it is not quick-tempered, it does not brood over injury,
it does not rejoice over wrongdoing
but rejoices with the truth.
It bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.
If there are prophecies, they will be brought to nothing;
if tongues, they will cease;
if knowledge, it will be brought to nothing.
For we know partially and we prophesy partially,
but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.
When I was a child, I used to talk as a child,
think as a child, reason as a child;
when I became a man, I put aside childish things.
At present we see indistinctly, as in a mirror,
but then face to face.
At present I know partially;
then I shall know fully, as I am fully known.
So faith, hope, love remain, these three;
but the greatest of these is love.
The LOVE CHALLENGE: Resounding gongs, clashing cymbals or the real deal?
WOW! What a challenge this scripture presents. Love is an action word, plain and simple. It requires action on our part. It requires evolution, it can not remain stagnant. The interpretation of love as a child can continue throughout our life as long as it remains "childlike" rather than "childish". The purity, the simplicity children show when they love someone is what we should all strive for. But as we mature, as we strive to stretch ourselves in directions we may have always imagined we could not attain, we learn very quickly that "love" transforms us throughout the years. With the grace of God, we become a new creation when we accept the loving, gentle guidance of the Holy Spirit and give ourselves completely to Jesus, in our heart, soul and mind.
This transformation can be very painful, because in our journey, in order to grow, we must realize our faults. We must painfully learn from our mistakes what love "is" and what love "is not".
Yesterday, the new Wii was enjoyed by all the kids.....for about thirty minutes, they laughed together, encouraged each other and had a ball. Then, as always with children, at least my children, there was a subtle breakdown in communication. The helpful, loving guidance of the older kids quickly evolved into frustration as the little ones struggled to do it "right". The criticism of the older ones, hurt and annoyed the younger ones and before I knew it I was in the midst of crying and screaming BANCHEES! Resounding gongs and clashing cymbals. So, I quickly stepped in with a conversation about what "love" is and what "love" is not, including my stump speeches on charity, forgiveness, sharing and kindness. God so often prepares me ahead of time (early that morning) for the challenges of my day!
Love NEVER Fails
Later last night after the little ones were in bed, Johnny and Reagan, who tend to be highly critical of each other in spite of their five year difference, turned me into a blubbering idiot! Reagan had prepared for her shot with her numbing cream, but this was her eighth shot since we got home, in the same arm, and it was VERY PAINFUL. This is so hard for her Dad. Normally, she would cry out for me to hold her hand or snuggle her, but this time she called out to Johnny. He was sitting across the room and rushed to her side, embracing her, rubbing her bald head and comforting her with gentle, loving words, like I hadn't seen since he was a five-year-old and she was a babe in arms.
I remembered instantly how Johnny was so excited to finally get to hold and kiss his new little sister when she was finally released from the hospital after being in the NICU for fourteen days. He had only been able to gaze at her from the window during this time because he was not allowed in the NICU. I can vividly remember him crying his eyes out and dirtying the window with his sobbing, because he could not hold "his baby". From the minute we placed her in his arms, he gently hugged her, caressed her head and kissed her cheeks. In the car and then later at home the "LOVE FEST" continued until we literally had to set a kissing limit! Last night I was transported back to that time again, a time of pure love and mutual admiration, a time we all understood what "love" truly is as it was acted out before our very eyes. As the scripture says, "Love NEVER fails....It BEARS all things, BELIEVES all things, HOPES all things and ENDURES all things", including sibling rivalries, sibling REVELries, selfishness and self-lessness in the face of cancer.
Mary Kidd Flemming blogs for The Handmaids of Mercy , The Splendor of Truth and The Compass Rose (Parenting and Family Life Issues). You may also enjoy her husband's website: Crossroads Family Center The Flemming Family is facing the greatest challenge of their lives as three of their six children have health issues and were all diagnosed within an eighth month period. The children's illnesses include: Auto-Immune Liver Disease, Type I Diabetes (insulin dependent), and Ewing's Sarcoma (a form of bone cancer). This has been an incredible journey of faith for the Flemming Family. While they don't fully understand why any of this happened to their children, they place their trust and faith totally in God's goodness. By sharing their faith journey, their hope is that other people will be drawn closer to The Holy Trinity (The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit). It is Mary's great hope that the sufferings of her children and family will be received by God for the conversion of souls. JESUS, WE TRUST in YOU!
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